Who needs retirement?

image
Why wouldn’t we decide to modify our chicken run today? Because we just finished it? Because it already cost approximately 1 million dollars? Because it’s for chickens? Because we’re in the middle of The Blizzard of 2015?  No, no, no, and NO! – those reasons are dumb! Our little ladies need protection from the elements. Don’t get me wrong, our current design is awesome. But… As it turns out, chickens don’t particularly like rain or snow, and the hardware cloth roof on the run does not provide protection from either. I came up with a simple design to just add some corrugated plastic roofing. Then, Hub and I went out to take measurements and make some drawings.  THAT’S where the trouble started.  One little, teeny, tiny what if lead to a slightly bigger what if and next thing you know, we are $$$ deep in a new peaked roof design! Luckily, Hub got a new table saw for Christmas and an unexpected day off (thanks to aforementioned storm).  Sort of seems like maybe I should be helping with that instead of blog, blog, blog…

W: Ok that is amazing. You guys are incredible. You guys get days off and you use them to build shit. For your chickens. You guys are doers. I like doers. My town has rules against people like you. How’s that hallway in your house comimg along? I mean, after you are done building stuff for your chickens, of course.

I knitted a hat the other day. I’ll post a pic after i make the pom pom tomorrow. I also knitted a snood. I’m all the way upstairs right now and not runninng all the way downstairs to get it to show you. I’m not even sure what, exactly, makes it a snood. It looks like a cowl to me, but what do I know… I have another snood in the works too, again, downstairs.  I can’t even tell you how jealous we are of your blizzard.

Em: First of all, ENOUGH with all the pressure  about our hall. We are having trouble getting the final designs from our contractor. Seems they’re busy on another project – something to do with a chicken coop.

I can’t wait to see pictures of the snood! I’ve never heard of that before. I’ve put my knitting on hold for now; I think I need someone to help me get the basics down before I proceed.

W: Hey post a pic of the finished chicken run – it’s pretty awesome!

Chicken Sweaters!

chicken sweater

OMG this is what you are trying to knit, isn’t it Em?! Consider yourself busted. Weirdo.

Em: First of all, I would never make my chickens look so nerdy. IF I choose to clothe my hens, I will first check the Kardashians’ latest instagrams and model my poultry fashion after what I find there. My chickens will have everything: ombres, jumpsuits, extra eyelashes, lip and butt implants, Uggs, giant earrings, etc. (you get the picture).

W: You have clearly given this some thought.

Em: If you lived with ANY girls, you would  understand! I’ve been searching for just the right nail colors for the girls too… Big pedi nights coming up!!!!!

W: You are nuts, Stefon.

Wicked gifting

Arranged in a wicked basket
Arranged in a wicked basket

 

W: Hospital in CT online gift shop  It is a pretty sweet looking basket, but “wicked”?  I feel like that’s a stretch… Even for New England.

EM: Order the basket and see what happens…maybe it IS wicked
W:  Of course I ordered it
MOM: And I thank you?
EL: Mom, maybe you shouldn’t go to sleep tonight…?
W:  I assumed it would be wicked awesome and not actually evil…does it seem to be more evil than awesome…?
MOM: I had Dad take them home tonight!
EL:  Good idea, better safe than sorry!
MOM:  By the way, they are wicked beautiful!

 

dance, monkey, dance!

Ellen:

So…. Mom has discovered our blog.  Or shall I say has “discovered”?  Ok, I told her where to find it. All but typed it into her iPad for her. The thing is, I am here for the weekend to “help” her with her recovery, and I have precious little to offer in terms of actual assistance.  I was running out of ideas, and she seemed stubbornly opposed to amusement of any kind!  Enter, blog.

Our Mom is now laughing out loud.
Em, she says you are a good writer.  And a bad knitter.
[Ellen drops mic, exits]
Wend:

It is happening, girls. Now that I know Mom is reading this, and it is her only source of entertainment while she is laid up, I feel compelled to write something. “Entertain me!” our reader is screaming (in my mind)!  Ugh, I don’t know if I can take the pressure… We are like Flight of the Conchords with our one fan/reader.

Em: You guys aren’t giving Mom enough credit. First, she thinks we’re hi-larious! And second, Look! Something shiney!

Hehehe! I think I’ve thrown her off our trail.  Pressure’s off! As you were.

W: I do see something shiny – an Athleta shopping bag! The white on top and silver on the bottom with orange handles one. They are now sideways bags – long and short – no more tall. I have mixed feelings about them. While I appreciate the update in appearance, I feel the overall quality of the product has, sadly, not been maintained.  I know it is just thier give-away shopping bag, but you can feel them pushing to see just how cheaply they can be made before they are just as disposable as the old paper ones.

Well done, Em.

Helping Mom

Hey girls I am working on this prototype wine holder for Mom while she is crutching around after her knee surgery this week.

wine holder

 

What do you think? And should I perfect it here and ship it, or will one of you make one there and take it to Mom? Obviously it needs some refinement and bedazzling – this is my first go at it.

Em: Does it have a sippy cup lid? Or maybe a straw lid? Lots of potential for splashing when hobbling around on crutches.

W: No. I bet Mom and Dad have some Press’n  Seal though.

Em: hahaha!!! I just took over your edit! Okay. Back to you now.

W: You TRIED to take over my edit. I think I snuck it in under the wire.  Nice try.

W: So will one of you make one of these for Mom, or should I get cracking on it?

Em: Yes! Of course I will make one! But I’ll need your specs!

W: We have knock-off Solo cups (kind of ironic since we live like 5 miles from real Solo Cup headquarters) so you may have to just trial and error where you cut the bottom off. Also I used a Chardonnay glass, not a big red one like Mom likes, because it fit more snuggly in the cup. Please feel free to experiment here.

I then “very precisely” stabbed big holes in the sides of the cup with big scissors, only because I couldn’t be bothered with running to the other room to fetch an actual hole punch. I do not recommend this method of hole- punching as it is somewhat dangerous. I used the kitchen string for pretty much the same reason. In my mind I used a nice length of pretty ribbon… that I had in the other room.

I suppose you could use any kind of plastic cup, even a regular, more permanent kind. You might then need to employ heavier cutting and hole-punching/drilling equipment. You would probably end up with a nicer product, but I think Mom will appreciate the temporary nature of the disposable cup – she won’t be crutching for more than a few of weeks.

You and your kids have mad DIY and bedazzling skills so I hesitate to even venture suggestions in that area. I trust you implicitly!

Em: Yea, I’m pretty sure I can nail this! Pics to come…

W: Maybe my iron is just low, but I don’t see any final product pics here! Also, on my iPad and phone, the pic I posted is not laying on it’s side like it seems to be when I view it on my laptop… How do you girls see it? I feel like maybe it doesn’t see me coming on the laptop and I catch it slacking off, laying down. Somehow maybe it gets a heads up from the i-products…

Em: My pic was not playing nicely. >:0/.   It refused to be in the same post as “the prototype.” Gave me an ultimatum- new pic or old. Side by side comparison was not gonna happen. 

I guess I pretty much showed that pic who’s boss.

Honey Badger!

Em: Nutmeggers are like honey badgers- we don’t give a shit how cold it is- we go to school! (Also in the catagory of we don’t give a shit: our forefathers when coming up with our nickname: Nutmeggers…

W: Yeh, I am not sure I am 100% onboard with this school closing for wind chill thing. They claim it is for the safety of walkers and bus stop waiters. And something about the busses not being able to start below a certain temperature…? A bunch of us met for dinner out last night, and the running theory among those who are legally minded (of which there are many-many in this small town) is that the school district doesn’t want to get sued for the frost bite a child gets while out waiting for the bus because the bus was late; or for the little kid who was let off the bus or walked home and found no parent home and the house locked because the parent couldn’t get off work in time to meet them so they got frost bite or froze to death.

So we are home again today. The wind chill danger should abate by this afternoon, so we are heading down to Play Again Sports this morning to see if we can find some half decent ice skates. The up side to this bitter cold is that the skating pond in town is frozen solid now! Yay!

Hooray! Wind chills are supposed to be crazy low again tomorrow  but the kids are going to school. Even the kids are looking forward to it. They may be looking forward to it more than I am actually. While thier being home unexpectedly has thrown a wrench into my plans for the week, it was kind of nice to have unplanned time at home. I haven’t let them sit in front of the tv much, so they have had to come up with ways to spend thier time.

So, for the first time in ages, all the little plastic “guys” came out and staged an impressive battle – army guys versus a mixed bag of cowboys, policemen, fire fighters, horses, enormous insects, and a variety of sea creatures. I don’t know who won –  I was deliberetly  disengaged on the treadmill with The Goldbergs. A stop motion Lego video was made – The Assemblage of a Christmas Ornament. We went out to Play It Again Sports for ice skates. We read. They did homework. Yesterday we had a marathon code session. Just now, they helped me make a coconut cake for dessert tonight. And they washed all the dishes.

I am meeting a friend for breakfast tomorrow and then taking dog to the dog park. Might hit the grocery store on my way home. And the gym. I am looking forward to, sort of.

Hi there, me again, Wendy. I want to add that we had such a blissful dreamy couple of days that it turns out we completely blew off the orthodontist yesterday. Oops.

Em: Update: Again- we don’t give a shit- we’ll give the kids the day off because it’s raining and cold. Who cares if it’s not snowing or even freezing????

W: Impressive display for sure. What did you say is for dinner the next 2 weeks…?