Out For Blood

Had a physical in March. Was told to get blood work done. Was told to fast for 12 hours. Are you kidding me? One would think this to be pretty easy- just go first thing in the morning, right? Well, one would be wrong. I like to eat late at night AND early in the morning. One cannot survive on three meals alone- dinner til bed is a long time to go without chips. Am I right?!!?!?

Last night I was busy sanding my new window boxes (I’ll be writing a separate post on that), so I didn’t get a chance to stuff my face with delicious tortilla chips. This sounds like the perfect set up for blood work this morning- except that because I’m sooooo good at planning that we didn’t eat dinner until 8:15 last night! We opened the pool yesterday- YAY! It was green- BOOO! We vacuumed and shocked it- now it’s clear -YAY! It’s only 50 degrees out today- BOOO!

Clearly not medicated yet… stupid fasting…

As I’ve mentioned before, I love me some banana with peanut butter every morning for breakfast. Instead of getting going on my day this morning, I had to watch my kids eat breakfast while I did NOT enjoy my banana and peanut butter OR my coffee OR the 20oz of water I start every day with (I’m not really sure the rules of fasting. Maybe I could have had water, but I wasn’t sure and there’s no way I want to try to fast for 12 hours again! Also- I didn’t brush my teeth… just in case. You cannot be too careful…. maybe I could have clarified the rules of fasting- but that’s a lot of work for someone who hadn’t eaten in nearly 12 hours!)

Ironically, that’s not even my story. When I arrived at the blood place- through the window, I saw a bunch of people in the waiting area having a lively discussion.  Of course I wanted to run for the hills, but because of the stupid fasting situation I reluctantly proceeded. I won’t even go into the crazy “discussion” of politics… you can use your imagination. But when that was done, a woman said, “And you know what else? I believe in aliens. Area 54 and all that. There are all those sightings of UFOs all around the world- all those people couldn’t be lying. And, now scientists can figure out how old things are and they have dated some things back to before the cavemen. And there’s pictures in caves. That’s how we got the technology for these babies (holding up her phone).”

Sadly, after that her husband came out from getting his blood drawn and they left. So my story ends here.

And also with you.

 

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Emily

Part-time blogger, carpenter, furniture refinisher, farmer... Full-time wife and mother of 4 (just kidding, 2!) I recently took up skiing and handstands, and I can totally kill it on the xbox version of The Voice (you definitely wouldn't be that impressed if you heard me live, but I don't care!)

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